The struggle (with self-care) is real.

I have officially been overdoing it lately. Like, wayyy overdoing it. The kids have been going through various bouts of illness ( this shit always comes in waves as you know) and we are totally over it. I have picked up some freelance transcription work, some “take surveys for money” stuff, and have been pushing to get my inventory posted to my Etsy store so I can start telling people about it. The survey stuff is pennies and really annoying, but I try to use it as filler for dead time. The transcription work is really fun, because previous jobs and training have made me a speed typer so I figured why not get paid for it? However fun, it is time consuming and has to be done at night when I should be getting ready for bed.

Which brings me to the major issue- SLEEP. The phrase “you can sleep when you are dead” is actually a threat when you’re a parent. You actually spend time contemplating how little sleep it will take for your body to give you the finger and tap out. I went at these freelance jobs all at once and too hardcore. I was looking to spread my entrepreneur baby wings all at once, and didn’t pace myself. So for now I’m trying to put most of my efforts into the Etsy store to give my brain a little break.

I am totally not a perfect mom, so please don’t think because I have my hand in many different cookie jars right now that I am succeeding at life. I am paying for it, guys. I am TIRED. Like jealous of animals who eat their young tired. Like full Mommy Monster “I will unhinge my jaw and lose my shit” tired. My anxiety is starting to sniff around and my heart races. And I KNOW better! I know the vicious circle of stress-anxiety-sleep and still have not managed to grab sleep by the balls and make it my bitch yet.

Nor have I been eating right or exercising. I will never understand why moms of small children don’t have the bodies of Olympic athletes. Like literally ALL we do is run after small children. ALL. DAY. LONG. Someone needs to do a case study and explain to me the science behind this. I’m not the mom that finishes what her kids eat all the time, I’m the mom that just eats on the go, and that’s my downfall. Those 20 pounds I lost last year have come back, if not more.

And tonight is the Games of Thrones Finale so of course early bedtime isn’t going to happen today, either. If someone out there can help me figure out how to get to bed earlier I am totally open to suggestions. For all the #MomBoss #SuperMom #DoingtheBestTheyCanMoms out there- take care of yourselves. We are busy with just the kids alone, before we add on all the extra stuff we have to or want to do. So tomorrow I’m going to try to get to the gym for the first time in forever- send positive vibes!

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