The danger of “boys will be boys.”

I legit cannot stand this term. It’s 2019, that term should be banned from the Urban AND Oxford Dictionaries. I think it is so dangerous and debilitating in society, and to our children. Obviously, there is a biological and hormonal difference between boys and girls. Venus and Mars, all that noise. Boy moms and girl moms have such different experiences and frustrations. Like one of my favorite memes from the internet I am always repeating: Boys are less drama than girls, but harder to keep alive.

This phrase isn’t talking about any of this. It’s implying the “boys club” mentality. It’s the mentality that got Trump elected, that gets rapists a slap on the wrist, that victim shames. It’s the mentality that gives boys a pass for acting in a way that society deems “normal to their gender.” It widens the gender gap, and teaches our kids that there is one.

I know I already talked about raising boys in 2019 in another blog, but bear with me.

As a boy mom, and damn proud of it tyvm, these are the things my boys will know:

1. Consent. How to get it, and what to do if you don’t.

2. A girl can do ANYTHING you can do, and there are times she is going to do it better.

3. There is no such thing as gender specific jobs or chores. This is not 1950.

4. Absolutely nothing you do is excused because of your gender.

How about instead of saying “boys will be boys,” or “typically dramatic girls,” we just say “typical asshole kids?” It rolls off the tongue so much nicer, doesn’t it? The world is going to try and fit our kids into as many little boxes and check marks as it can, for their whole life. How about we don’t help it out?

So yes, you will proudly see me on the Gram posting #boymama- but it will never be an excuse or pass for anything they do or say. The only thing it will do is make me crazy, which it totally has. 🙂

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